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‘My husband bought our surrogate a £9k car – he said it’s for the baby’s safety’

A mum-to-be took to Reddit to ask users for advice on whether she should call her husband out for crossing the line with their surrogate – and people were keen to share their thoughts

Man and woman's had on surrogate's belly

A woman was left stunned when she discovered that her husband had gifted their surrogate with a car.

The anonymous mum-to-be explained that she and her husband Hunter decided to get a surrogate after struggling with fertility problems.

The surrogate, who is a friend of a friend, has a contract with the couple and is currently carrying their baby, which was conceived via the OP’s own egg.

So far, things have been going well. Or they were until she reached out and said she was uncomfortable with some of the things the woman’s husband has done for her.

“I’ve noticed that he’s been focusing his all attention on our surrogate like skipping work to visit her or get her things she didn’t ask for,” the woman wrote in her post on Reddit.

He gifted her a car


Getty Images/iStockphoto)

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“He chats with her all the time on social media and also constantly offers to do things for her like… drive her places and sometimes even invite her out or offer to repair stuff for her.

“She complained to me about this and even told me about things he’s been doing that I didn’t even know about, like bringing her gifts.”

When the woman tried to reason with her husband, he accused her of being jealous.

And when she told him it was the surrogate that had complained, he didn’t believe her.

“Our surrogate called me saying that Hunter came over and told her guests to leave,” the woman wrote.

“I asked why and she said that he wanted to show her the 9k car he bought for her.

“I was shocked, she said she declined the car and asked him to leave but he started arguing with her about using public transportation and risking our baby’s wellbeing.”

“Fuming”, she called her husband and demanded he returns home instantly.

She told him he was being “overstepping, disrespectful, and inappropriate” towards the surrogate but in response, he said his only motivation was to ensure their baby’s safety.

“I told him to stop disrespecting the woman and stop using the baby as an excuse to stomp all over her boundaries,” she said, adding, “he even accused me of not loving our son as much he does.”

Reddit users were quick to share their thoughts on the woman’s situation, and many said her husband’s behaviour was a “red flag”.

One person said: “That behaviour is so suspect… why is he giving her SO much attention? It looks so obsessive…”

Another wondered: “As this surrogate is a ‘friend of a friend’ is there any chance your husband knew her before and either had a relationship or has a bit of thing for her?”

A third added: “At first I thought he was just being overly nice to the woman carrying his child. Then it got super creepy lol.”

“He’s overcompensating because he feels that he doesn’t have a connection to his child,” theorised someone else.

“Mum provided the egg, a friend of a friend provided the sperm and the surrogate is carrying the baby.

“He’s going overboard trying to create a connection by being the one who loves the baby the most and is providing for it and keeping it safe.

“Is it a**holish? Oh, definitely. Is it understandable? Yeah, kind of.”

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